


No Exit

by Philosopher_King



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Brotherly Affection, Brotherly Angst, Brotherly Bonding, Dysfunctional Family, Gen, Post-Canon, References to Torture
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-14
Updated: 2017-09-14
Packaged: 2018-12-29 16:32:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,283
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12088938
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Philosopher_King/pseuds/Philosopher_King
Summary: Imprisoned in Thanos's dungeons, Thor and Loki get to talking.





	No Exit

**Author's Note:**

  * For [thebookhunter](https://archiveofourown.org/users/thebookhunter/gifts).
  * Translation into Français available: [Aucune sortie](https://archiveofourown.org/works/12657477) by [ElodieTheFangirl](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ElodieTheFangirl/pseuds/ElodieTheFangirl), [Philosopher_King](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Philosopher_King/pseuds/Philosopher_King)



> [thebookhunter](http://archiveofourown.org/users/thebookhunter/pseuds/thebookhunter), a.k.a. [@incredifishface](http://incredifishface.tumblr.com/), won a ~1000-word fic in my giveaway on Tumblr. Here was the prompt: "After an adventure or something, they both have been taken prisoners and are covered in chains in a dark dungeon, (separated by a wall or not, whatever). Anyway, they’re salty and annoyed and uncomfortable, and they also get talking, because there’s not much else to do. Maybe they’ve been through the enemies phase already, and this is kind of a reunion and a difficult, temporary alliance that went wrong, or maybe they’re still young, before all the shit between them happens, and the bad feelings are beginning to surface, together with hurt and a feeling of inevitability. You decide. (do as many changes as you need to!)"
> 
> My brain went in a Thanos & _Infinity War_ direction, so this doesn’t follow the prompt exactly, but I tried to capture the basic idea. It’s a little longer than 1000 words, too, but that was predictable. And I’m experimenting with writing in the present tense! You know, since everyone else is doing it.
> 
> Loki's brief account of his imprisonment by Thanos accords with my Loki-in-the-Void fic [The Abyss Gazes Also](http://archiveofourown.org/works/5236796/chapters/17108125), but you don't need to have read that to understand.

“Loki? Can you hear me?”

Thor directs his question at the wall that separates their cells. He knows that Loki is in the adjoining cell because he watched him being shoved into it; and he knows that he cannot be too far from the wall to hear, because each cell is only wide enough for one man to sit as Thor is sitting, with his wrists manacled to the wall on either side of his head and his ankles in shackles bolted to the floor. The only question is whether the wall between them is permeable to sound.

Loki answers with a dull “Yes.”

“Do you know how to get us out of here?”

“Obviously not.” Thor isn’t sure if the contempt in his voice is aimed at him or at Loki himself. “If I did, I wouldn’t have ended up in Midgard trying to secure the Tesseract for him.”

Thor knew that, and immediately kicks himself for asking.

“Is this… what it was like for you?” Thor asks cautiously, hoping Loki can hear in his voice that it is sympathy, not prurient curiosity or self-interest, that prompts the question.

For a while there is silence from the other side of the wall, and Thor fears that Loki has taken his question amiss. But then he hears a sigh and Loki’s halting voice saying, “Not exactly. I wasn’t chained, except with handcuffs at first to suppress my seiðr. As a longer-term inmate, you see, I needed to be able to eat and drink. And to piss and shit in the designated bucket.” He makes a noise somewhere between a snort and a humorless laugh. “I had a little more room to pace, as well.”

Thor begins to suspect that the ache in his chest and stomach, verging on nausea, is not only a result of the blows dealt by Thanos’s Chitauri guards.

“What do you think he’ll do?” Thor asks. His voice comes out unexpectedly hoarse.

Another cheerless half-laugh. “Well, since he hasn’t killed us yet, he clearly thinks we’re useful for something. Information, perhaps. But since he no longer has the Mind Stone with which to extract it directly—unless your friends in Midgard have already fallen—I would expect rather more physical torture.” A pause. “Perhaps that would be preferable.”

Thor cannot convince himself that he does not fear torture, especially from a captor as ruthless and inventive as the Mad Titan. But he fears less for himself than for his brother. Fears not only how Thanos might hurt him, but what he had—has?—the power to twist Loki into.

Loki is speaking again, musing with a false lightness: “I could imagine him using you as bait or a bargaining chip to get something from Odin, but me? He’s seen enough of our relationship, virtually firsthand, to know better than to try.”

A sharp pain lances through Thor’s chest, and he knows it is from none of his injuries. “Loki…”

“Very likely I am only here to suffer the consequences of my failure in Midgard.” Loki’s fear is evident beneath the resigned nonchalance with which he tries to mask it. “I should have known I could not escape that. They promised they would always find me. I should have believed them.” Bitterness leaches into his voice when he says, “You should have let me win.”

“I could not, you know I could not,” Thor protests even as his heart seems to twist painfully in his chest. “Not after what Heimdall had seen… what I had seen.” They have had this argument before, but Thor still cannot stop himself from insisting, “You should have told me about Thanos. I could have helped you.”

The sigh from the other side of the wall sounds irritable. “Why would I have told you?” Loki says with that tone of exaggerated patience that conveys its opposite. “I hated you. Or don’t you remember?”

“Because he distorted your memories.”

“Some of them, yes. But not all.”

Of course. Because Loki had hated Thor—or seemed to—before he fell. He had been desperate to fight his own brother, even to the death; indeed, he succeeded in killing him for a terrible moment, whether or not he meant to. In  _“I remember a shadow—living in the shade of your greatness”_ Thor can hear the echo of  _“I never wanted the throne; I only ever wanted to be your equal.”_

“You still remember the shadow, then?” he asks softly, carefully.

Loki understands his meaning. “Yes,” he replies.

“I always saw you as my equal,” Thor says, quiet but emphatic.

“You could have said so.” He is making no effort now to hide the bitterness. “You could have shown it.”

“I thought I did. I never treated you as anything else…”

“Not only to me,” Loki cuts in. “The rest of Asgard thought me unworthy to touch the hem of your garment.”

Thor cannot place where he has heard the unusual expression, but he sets it aside. “What should I have said?” he asks. It comes out defensive. “I would have thought you would not want me to fight your battles.”

“I didn’t,” Loki snaps; “I don’t. But I wanted you to try, so that I could  _tell_  you to stop fighting my battles. You never even tried.”

Guilt clenches an icy hand around Thor’s stomach, but resentment quickly flares to meet it. “And that was worth killing me for?” he challenges, matching ice for ice.

“My whole life was a death by a thousand cuts,” Loki hisses back.

Thor can scarcely believe that Loki is still trying to excuse, to defend himself; and yet he wonders with a sinking heart why he is surprised, and whether he would love his brother any less if he did not repent. Still, Thor is not without weapons of his own, nor does he scruple to use them against one he loves. “Well, it seems likely you will soon have the chance to watch me die, if that is still what you want.”

The silence that follows tells Thor that he has struck where it hurts, though his victory brings him no joy.

“That was never what I wanted,” Loki says, muted.

“No, you wanted to wield the blade yourself,” Thor cannot stop himself from accusing. “What worse punishment could Thanos devise than to take that privilege away from you?”

Loki is silent again, and Thor wonders whether he has gone too far. He does not want them to go to torment and death like this, striking out at each other in resentment and spite. Still competing as they have their whole lives—as their father wanted them to, Thor reflects with a flash of anger—only now it is over which of them can inflict greater pain on the other. He suspects that is what Thanos wants.

He is about to apologize, to try to calm the waters, but Loki speaks first. “You are half right,” he says quietly. “Even if he knows he can get nothing else out of it, he will hurt you to hurt me.”

Thor finds himself strangely moved by the admission; he knows it is the closest he will come, for now, to an apology or a confession of love.

_‘For now’?_ he wonders, catching himself. He does not believe this is the end for them. He still trusts their allies, or Loki, or himself to find them a way out. He does not tell Loki as much, knowing he will only be mocked, as usual, for his foolish optimism. He smiles to himself, vowing silently that Loki will be mocking him for thousands of years to come. He can think of no happier fate.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Yeah, I know the title is a little silly/pretentious, and I haven't even read that play (a lot of other crap by Sartre, yes, but not that). But I thought it was appropriate in a sense that runs counter to the point of the play: Thor and Loki can't escape their commitment to each other, but they wouldn't want to. Other people can make our lives hell, yes, but they're also what make life _life_.


End file.
